Song of a regretful heart

If you are reading this, I urge you to read without stop or start

For this is the song of a regretful heart

First of all, to write this verse, I do not have the right

For trying to redeem, I should not even be in your sight.

Even if I sing this sad tune and shout my voice hoarse,

I don’t think It will convey the tiniest bit of my remorse.

On that fateful night, on the way there were warning bells,

My mind stopped processing, mistaking mere banter for all wrong signals.

With a remorseful sigh,I took an ugly bend,

And forever I feel lost a fabulous friend

Hopefully one day, after we put between us enough miles,

On your face there won’t be any anger or hurt, but bucketful of smiles

I know you will become big and conquer the mighty and the rest,

I’ve known you since long and wish you all the best

If u still feel bad, banish me and hate me, for what I did was totally wrong

It’s a sad but the right way to end this regretful heart song.

-- Anupam Chakilam

Death of Cities

No, this is not about the whole traffic congestion, abuse of resources, water problem..basically problems caused due to ultra over population in big cities. This post is about the death of cities identity.

I happened to chance upon this article from outlook which was moderate in its approach and this absolute shocker frm CNR Rao. Both these articles got me thinking. Having spent my childhood in Hyderabad, college days in Chennai, the few working days till now in Bangalore and Pune, I feel I'm fairly qualified to comment on the state of these cities.

It is obviously an undisputed fact that the cities I've spent time in are growing , and mostly for the good. But they are also fast loosing their charm. Each city is looking more and more like a clone of the other. The individuality of each city , the charm that they have been famous for are fast being forgotten or lost.

It was in my second year I think when I went to visit good friends Sundar's house near Chitrakulam in Mylapore. The whole place reminded me of scenes from some period movie. There were age old agraharam houses , two ancient Vishnu temples , and temple Elephants on the street!! The maruti car parked on the narrow street looked soo out of place. Forgot the British raj built buildings and corridors. I felt this place deserved the tag of heritage area more than anything else.

Another place that immediately comes to mind is Laad bazaar , one of the four annexes of Charminar. The place hasn't changed in breadth or businesses done in more than 200 years, except for the fact that the road is always jammed with traffic. I've always felt the four roads leading to Charminar need to be cordoned off, atleast for buses. It has the potential to be something like Taj Mahal, but is right now no better than most of the slums in old city.

Although I havent explored Banglores or Pune streets to know enough about their respective heritage , Im sure they have enough and more to preserve. The glass facades and KFC's are all good , but they get damn boring after a point of time. Im really happy about each cities rise , but I do want to feel proud of how people before felt proud of their cities. Hyd as the Nawabi place, Chennai as best place for well preserved temples, Bangalore as the beautiful city and Pune as pensioners paradise.

Phew, a blog after really long. Need to keep this alive by posting atleast once a quarter.

P.S:1) Sundaram, you live in an amazing place with all modernity.
2) I'm not sure what the present situation is in Laad bazaar. My memory of that place is from about 10 years ago.

Hitchhikers Guide To Hitchhiking

Recession has affected a lot of things in my life , but there is one positive aspect of it which I need to appreciate. It has made people more sympathetic to poor lift takers like me. I used to take lifts during my intern time at Hyd and now to go to my office. And man, is there a differance!!

Anyways, Hitchhking a.k.a lift taking.The most obvious reason why you would Hitchhike is due to lack of decent affordable transport, or like in my case , you are just a born prudent cheapo who hates giving the auto guys 30 bucks for the minimum distance. Here are some more reasons why you should give lift a try.

• Savings: on petrol, pollution and the whole Go Green thing.
• Contacts: You can start a conversation with them . And you never know. He could be a big shot in that next door posh company in ur Sez into which you've always tried getting into but felt they would not even allow you from their backdoor cafetaria entrance. And he gave you a lift implies he is in a benevolent mood. Take its the refferal I say.
• Timepass:Quite a few lift givers are expansive talkers, boring at that. But still, the poor guy is giving you a lift dude. Acknowledging them by atleast nodding your head is minimum courtsey.
• More timepass:You can meet a good open minded person of the opposite sex, making for atleast an addition in that fast shrinking single girls/boys list of yours. How you take it from here and form further scope entirely depends on you.( Ok, even this almost never happens)
  

Here are a few things i found helped me get faster and easier lifts.

• Dress properly. A sincere attires helps.
• Show of your office tag. This is the only time outside office that I show my office tag, so that the person knows I am new age Indias corporate slave dog .I mean, a harmless liftable person.
• Try taking lift at junctions or road bends or speed breakers or wherever vehicles go slower than pedestrians. People almost never stop for you if they are already going at high speeds.
• Taking lift near temples. About 50% of the people somehow slow down when they pass a temple, giving a silent prayer hoping the client will be more reasonable this time around atleast. Although that never happens, it presents an oppurtunity for us lift pouncers to lift that much tired left hand with thumbsup for the lift call. They will most certainly give a lift, assuming they are doing a good samiritan deed. Nice dumbos they r.
• Avoid cars. they almost never give lift. And even if they do , it will b some call centers cab returning from work and hoping to make a quick buck out of you. Bikers are soo much better.

Ah, felt nice blogging after long:)

Identity

Before getting into the whole cliched and senti 'experiences' post , lets just take a break here. yesterday, I wrote about how I am a alak a3 guy first... ad finally and IITian. This branding got me thinking, as to what exactly is my identity.

Then it struck me. I( and i'm guessing most) view themselves as a part of subset and then the bigger set and so on. For eg,. I view myself as a Telangana guy, then a person from AP, then from South India and finally an Indian, necessarily in this order. But this alone will hardly complete my identity.

So what exactly makes up for identity? Googling a lil , i found this satisfactory asnwer for identity. Identity is 'what' or 'whom' you identify with. Wiki says "in lay mans terms, what ever makes a quanity same or different". Any1 sensing a problem with the definition? Infact there are some random meta physical and logics of indetity at wiki.

Yes, Yes.. I am writing all this because my project report is done, and have nothing better to do and so felt writing random blogs kills good time. Although I did seriously think about Identity, and I still am. So, care to leave your identity below and give new insights into your identity? I'll be glad.

Ok, end of break

End of days

Well, it's over. Or almost so. If I do a decent viva voce (is likely), and the good Rajendran doesn't pain with no dues ( heavily heavily unlikely) , I should be through with insti in at most a week. 've been itching to write about take aways, you know, final words. But there are too many aspects in insti life to cover.
I see myself as an Alak A3 guy first, a civil 05 batch guy , a finance core , a gult and an IIT Madras man , mostly in this order. Had quite a few interesting experiences being all these, independently and together. Will narrate each. Check out this blog for the Alak A3 guy first. Its about 12 now, Lan cut, so will update tomorrow.

Wind

There was no wind .

It was a chilly day. Not a bristle moved on any of the trees that lined the road. Trees which became conspicuous only on ardent observation. It was not like there was no activity on the road. In fact, there was an abundance of it. In the morning, it was a whore to the countless people using it for their morning walks , their morning squats and their morning solitudes. Only the shabbily laid footpath knows the number of love birds it played host to , the number of make ups and break ups it facilitated. Hawkers slowly creep along its length as the Sun grows stronger. It becomes busy , or so it would want us to think, as the asphalt becomes hotter and shade becomes meagre. But the actual business , like on most roads like these , starts only when the brighness wanes. Hawkers one by one give way to hookers. Ordinary shops become opium dens. The trade that goes on can be done only by the night. The world sleeps at this time, or chooses to look away, conveniently blaming the darkness for this so called filth. The road does not understand the reason, nor does it ask for one.

Amidst all this activity, no one notices the trees. Their only shot at perceptible recognition is when the wind blows and a leaf quivers , and nature willing, falls on the road.

But still,
There was no fking wind that day.

1 less thing on wish list.

Im sure 90% of u reading this blog would have sometime or other exclaimed during the quiz week , " Fuck quiz. I'll go to write with zero preparation.For 20 marks and all too much pain these chunde quizzes". After puting marathon of " liars game" yesterday, my state was excatly that. I've said this like a million times but always ended up mugging something, just enough to see me cross the E line. But yesterday was different . I could feel it. Final year mama. And I did it. Put marathon animated fart session courtsey kkt, c3 and dalal in Jam till 2 and crashed like a Taramani toddy addict after that. Bliss.

To be frank, I chose a very convenient 'estimation of construction' course, which any arbit 8th class drop out in this country could have easily managed to pass. So plan to repaeat the same, but this time properly for P slot. Some arbit self study course.Anyways, Adios.